Shenani-Banned!

Banned at Shenaniganz: The Legends (Who Can’t Hang)

Ever walked into a place and thought, “Wow, they really get me?” At Shenaniganz Rockwall, we take pride in curating an experience so epic, we’ve even curated our own “Wall of Shame” list. That’s right- our front doors aren’t just for entering. They’re for announcing who’s not welcome. Why? Because some legends just CAN’T hang.

Why Ban Anyone?

Let’s be clear: we love a good story. But sometimes, enough is enough! Our banned list isn’t about grudges- it’s about protecting the sanctity of fun. And yes, we’re side-eyeing you, Jerry Jones.

Meet the Unwelcome Committee

Jerry Jones

Crime: Forgetting that “team player” applies off the field.
The Cowboys’ owner might know touchdowns, but his playbook on diplomacy? Let’s just say it’s been flagged since 1957. At Shenaniganz, we prefer our drama confined to Lazer Tag battles.

Nico Harrison

Crime: Trading away common sense (and Luka Dončić).
The Mavericks’ GM thought swapping a Slovenian superstar for bad luck was a power move. Spoiler: Dallas fans can find the GOATs at Shenaniganz if you know where to look!

Dez Bryant

Crime: Dropping the ball (and his credibility).
Dez’s mall meltdown? Legendary. At Shenaniganz, we enforce a strict “No Belt, No Service” policy. Underwear is not outerwear.

Lamar Odom

Crime: Being the Kardashian curse incarnate.
Two-time NBA champ? Sure. But when your reality TV drama overshadows your free throws, you’re better off banned. Our mini-golf course is for putting, not pouting.

DeAndre Jordan

Crime: Forgetting how to dunk (on loyalty).
DeAndre’s 2015 Mavericks U-turn left Dallas speechless. At Shenaniganz, we’d sooner forgive a gutter ball than a team betrayal!

Marky Mark

Crime: Being too funky (and not in a good way).
From “Good Vibrations” to very bad decisions, Marky Mark simply harshes the vibe. Keep the dance moves clean, folks!

Ryan Lochte

Crime: Robbing Rio of its dignity.
The Olympic swimmer’s “gas station lie” was more inflated than a pool float. At Shenaniganz, we only tolerate tall tales from our Drew at Rozie’s. #IYKYK

Redemption Arc? Maybe.

Think you’re banned for life? Think again! (Looking at you, Mavs trio5.) Donate to our charity partner, The Boys & Girls Club of Northeast Texas, and maybe we’ll reconsider. Until then, enjoy the view from the parking lot.

Ready to join the fun (and stay off the list)? Book your Shenaniganz adventure today- where the only thing we take seriously is fun.

Did We Forget Someone?

What’s your take on our banned list? Think we missed someone? Slide into our DMs-we’re all ears (and maybe a little petty). Post your suggestions here!